Starting 2019 Cracked Not Broken

Ok we are officially in the beginning of a New Year and for so many of us this is a chance to begin anew. This is the time for resolutions, for altering our attitudes and trying the hard things we have tried to avoid. To me this is a natural progression. I’m a creature who loves fresh things. There’s simply nothing better than having freshly shaved legs and sliding into freshly laundered sheets am I right? You know I am!

So I am one kind of person…and there are other kinds but the polar opposite is the person who says what’s the point…you have all year to change JUST DO IT ALREADY and stop talking about it. Ok super logical person…I hear ya but let me have my bloody fresh start for a minute ok? I promise I’ll annoy the snot outta ya for a month or two with my updates on social media if you keep that attitude but if you just shift a wee bit and think…FINALLY Julie is doing what she wants…well then you’ll get a smile here and there from my updates.

SOOO what the HELL am I writing about today?

This blog was started 9 years ago as a kind of a diary to help me remember my life after a brain injury. So today I’m using it as a diary for myself….and you if it strikes you in the right way.

2018 seemed to be a fucking challenging year for myself and others. I saw many victories but oh-so many heart-wrenching events and situations happened for my family and friends. We lost good people, had health crisis’…and so much more. I’ve learned much about myself and am learning not to jump off the deep end when my children are involved. I don’t think I had a “word of the year” but the one God wanted me to learn seemed to be “patience”.

Last year I truly isolated myself as I haven’t done in years. I hit a place where I scared myself again. The very real challenges in our lives almost took me over the edge but I held on and made it round the other side. I did isolate myself, I huddled up, gathering the energy I needed and shielded myself from the pain as I needed to.

Cracked Not Broken

In December I had a health scare of my own. I couldn’t breathe. Went to the doctor and it was pneumonia/bronchitis which had come on with NO warning. The doctor did a quick once over and sat me down with a very serious demeanour and told me I needed to focus on my own health. I had quit smoking and one would think that this doctor would be raving about my good health…and yet he wasn’t.

The stress had taken a toll.

Today I am sitting in Florida where our family has escaped to have a few weeks to just BE….with no stress. Ok it was a 21 hour drive but SO worth it.

florida 3

We have been resting, exploring and enjoying each other in a very new way. I have had no plans here, have not done business things and we are truly regrouping and resting. Because I have slowed down, I can see how I dropped the ball with my emotions. I have not been taking care of me.

For 2019 my word is PRESENT. I vow to be present for myself. I will not seek perfection in any area of my life…but I will experience it fully and ensure that I am dealing with ALL of the emotions/stressors in a positive way for my health and wellness. When I am healthy I can serve others far better.

florida 2

So to you my reader friend…are you PRESENT for YOURSELF? or are you falling into the trap I had…where I was present for others instead?

 

 

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