They Stole My Mojo & Left Me With Wet Wipes – Joys of Motherhood

This weekend has reminded me why I’ll never qualify for the June Cleaver award or any other motherhood award. Deep within my soul I do have a talent for organizing and managing schedules. Apparently the rest of life is sitting in front of it so this talent hasn’t a chance to flourish. Or so I tell myself.

Honestly, when I had children it all began so innocently. With our first born I had those mini-baby socks all paired, sheets were properly folded with the fitted corners tucked into each other….yes it was all so beautiful for a wee spot of time. Soon enough this little baby we brought home began to move, to wail and to suck my sensibilities dry. Like a desert.


They Stole My Mojo & Left Me With Wet Wipes

Harsh? Only if you’ve never been a mother who can be remotely honest with herself, no matter how much we love our children we cannot claim to have had a clue how we’d really change before they occupied their space in our lives.  As these babies develop and the expectations upon you grows, slowly your intellect morphs into one you’ve previously been unaware of.

By the time my eldest was 4 I could recite the lines to story books, the songs from hundreds of tunes which are far too upbeat and happy to be from my playlist and don’t even get me started on the contents of my purse. My life morphed from Etta James on my ipod and hot Friday nights with hubby to yogurt tubes,wet wipes and co-sleeping by 9pm.

These days the girls are 8 & 10 and one would think that I’m back into my groove or getting there as my kids become more independent. Okay, I thought I would be…alas once again I’m proven incorrect. These days each room of my house has loom bands strewn around, there are horrified screams as a daughter discovers a sister has used something of hers, I no longer own my own socks….heck I really own nothing of my own as these growing girls seep into every nook and cranny of the house.

Stealing Moments of Joy

This is all sounding grim but I still have a smile. There are small victories each day, such as the time when my 10 year old asked what a douche is after seeing a TV commercial. With joy in my heart, I revelled in her repulsion as I began “Well Sydney…the vagina…”. Her squeal echoed through my intestines as my smile spread. It’s the small victories as a Mum.

I may be a sucker for their belly laughs, their sweet sleeping faces but nothing brings me joy like embarrassing them and having them laugh about it later with their friends. Sigh, this is an amusing stage to be at, where these little ladies are feeling out the world and their places within it.

These girls are becoming quite busy, with phone calls coming in and face time dates with friends it’s not easy to keep up. We are also beginning the role of driver as their social calendar fills up and let’s get real….that’s not easy to manage. Suddenly I’m expected to remember that they have back to back birthday parties on a weekend and prepare accordingly.

Giving Up to Get Ahead

Although it sounds simple, that’s 4 gifts, 4 over night bags and more to organize. Sure, I could allow the girls to pack for themselves but I’d prefer to have my children include things like toothbrushes and underwear so I pack for them. It was when I picked up the girls from the 1st birthday party that I realized we had just 2 hours to get ready for the next one that night.

These girls were punch-drunk tired from the 1st party and the bickering/whining had begun within minutes of strapping into the car. With a deep sigh, I gave up trying to pretend I had this, instead of stressing I cracked jokes and tried to appeal to the wacky side of the girls. In the 5 minutes it took to drive home I detoured past 4 fights and informed them that they were allowed to pack for themselves. WOT??? Yup Mum had given up.

We had a hilarious, fun few hours before the next party. The kids were chilled out, I was relaxed and we even cleaned the house a bit. Giving up actually got me ahead in this case…who knew?

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Did you catch the moral of this little article? Ready for it?

If you drive your kids around, allow them to drive you crazy and get them some kind of a social life….every now and again you and your husband get 2 nights alone with some Etta James…..


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4 Responses

  1. Haha. My daughter is only 3 but I hear you about not knowing or being prepared for how having children will change your life…. or you. I’m truly scared for when she’s 8. Please tell me it doesn’t go by as quickly as the first few years. Wait, no, I don’t want to hear the answer !

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